Thursday, June 02, 2005

I'm Over Him!!!

Two or three days ago, a good friend of mine was so excited to tell us how proud she was of her finally getting over this former officemate of ours who left her for the mother of his illegitimate daughter. How she got embroiled in that situation is a totally different story altogether. Now this friend of mine, after not having the inclination to talk to the guy for some time, finally was able to do that without, according to her, feeling anything for the guy anymore. Meaning, she felt totally indifferent to him, which is a sign that she’s finally over him. However, I noticed a different glow in her when she was telling us about the details of their conversation. She had a certain glow you’d probably associate only with bliss. But I believed her of course. I tend to take people’s words for their face value because I don’t think I should force my own reality to them. Anyway, just before lunch today, this same friend tells me how bad she felt about this news that she got from another friend/ex-officemate of ours about the same guy who broke her heart. Apparently, he and the supposed wife are not together anymore and that he’s living in with another girl who’s expecting a child as well. She felt bad about it but she maintains that she’s over him.
I tell her I understand why she feels that way. I’ve had the same experience when some bloke left me, telling me he realizes he’s not yet ready for a relationship (it came after almost a year) and then I find out after a few weeks that he’s going steady with somebody else. That made me really furious. If I’d seen him then, I would’ve crushed his balls. But that’s just because during that time, I was not yet over him. That’s my point. I wouldn’t have reacted at all, not have any tinge of feeling about the situation at all, if I were truly over him.
Like what I said, I don’t want to force my reality to my friend (She’s not reading this. I’m crossing my fingers.), but I really think that people only react to situations, events, people, and whatever which mean something to them. It’s their instinct to not give a care if they know there’s nothing in it for them. The natural reaction is for people to protect their own interests. I don’t blame her though for convincing us that she’s over him, however lame the effort to cover it up is. (Forgive me dear.) But that’s also part of her effort to protect herself.
I’ve been through what she’s experiencing right now. And judging from how things turned out for me, I know she will experience better days in the future. I just hope it happens really soon for her.

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